A lot comes with the territory of being homosexual, but the one question that seems to sometimes be asked louder than the rest is if it was a choice to be gay or if I was born this way.
In a manner of speaking, it is both.
Everyone is born into this world with a clean slate and raised by their families and surroundings in a certain way. After a while, people start making their own decisions and forming their own opinions that are sometimes contrary to how they were raised from youth.
Some will argue this is the “born this way” philosophy. The philosophy says regardless of the type of upbringing someone has or what they are accustomed to, they will live their lives in the way they were meant to. These people can often do so in a manner contrary to what their upbringing or environment expects from them.
On the other end of the spectrum, there are people who continue to live their lives according to the upbringing they had because they feel it is what is best for them. In regards to the LBGTQIA community, these people may ignore any sexuality that does not match what is expected of them and stay on the beaten path, regardless of what they feel inside. Living that lifestyle is considered to be the “chose to be this way” argument.
There really is not clear-cut answer to the ‘choice’ question. For me, I chose to be gay and have never looked back. I have had my ups and downs and my fair share of moments spent wondering if what I chose was right, but I would not have it any other way.
For others, it is not that easy. They may find the way they were brought up fits a certain lifestyle mold. This makes it easy to continue down the path of that lifestyle choice. Unfortunately, some people who choose this path struggle with the decision later in life.
I am not saying that every single straight person in the world is secretly struggling with homosexuality or that every gay person has a straight streak in them. There is just a broad spectrum of answers when it comes to this question that people do not understand.
The range of uniqueness in the gay community is why the acronym that describes the community at large is so lengthy. I still think the acronym is completely excessive, but it does show how complex and diverse the community is.
On top of it being an extremely huge gray area, asking if I was born gay is offensive. I do not like it when people ask me this question. It is frustrating that people do not realize how rude and personal a question that is. To echo this frustration, typically my response is one of sarcasm and disdain.
It is no one’s business how I chose to live my life. If someone really wants to get to know me on a personal level, there are other ways of asking that do not make them sound like an ignorant, uneducated person.
In the end, everyone should live a life that is completely satisfying based on his or her own standards. Instead of getting caught up in society’s habit of slapping labels onto everything, people should just live their lives.