Ladies and gentlemen, it is that time of year—some hearts are full of hope, some are stinging with rejection and the candy aisles are packed with hopeless romantics buying candy marked up to three times more than what it is worth. It’s Valentine’s Day—eve.
I see myself as a love connoisseur of all kinds—gay, straight, bisexual, pansexual, asexual—I am at your disposal. Many have called me the chosen one when it comes to my unorthodox methods of love making and matching, and even though I am currently single, it works. Trust me.
One of my unique ways of approaching a relationship is role-reversal. Now, I’m not talking about the kinky stuff, but if that works for you, please be my guest. Whatever floats your boat. I’m specifically referring to the “roles” that women and men play on this historic day.
Men usually go to great lengths to be creative while their women wait to criticize the elaborate schemes their partners come up with to get in their pants. Well, it’s 2014 and I’m here to tell you it’s time for a change. To my homosexuals out there, you all are doing a great job with the romance—it’s the straight people I need to set, well, straight.
Men, it’s time for you to sit back, relax and let the ladies make the move on V-Day. Ladies, it’s your turn to be creative and fierce with your decisions.
Buy the flowers, the stuffed animals and the box of chocolates for your man. Take the initiative and make the reservation at the restaurant you want to visit, and, dare I say it, pay the bill. In fact, go buy him some nice jewelry. Guys always like nice watches. I may not have a catchy slogan to use such as, “He went to Jared” or “Every kiss begins with Kay,” but I’m sure something can happen when he sees that Fossil watch. Just use your imagination.
That being said, gentlemen, you are not out of the woods either. It’s time for you to jazz it up and look sexy. I know some are not blessed with glorious six-packs, but the keg isn’t bad to rock either. Strut your body and show her what you’re working with. Clearly she’s not just with you for your brain. Ladies, if your men expect you to go to Victoria’s Secret, tell them to go to Calvin Klein and get some nice looking briefs. However, it should be noted that a trip to Victoria’s Secret would still be greatly appreciated in spite of these role reversals.
Now, if you are single and trying to captivate someone’s heart, I would still try these methods. It couldn’t hurt for you ladies to let that special guy know right away who really wears the pants. And gentlemen, you know you picked a winner if she’s willing to pick up the tab at the end of the night. Everyone will win if they open up their hearts and accept change for one day.
This year, role reversal is key. These methods should spice things up and make for a very eventful night.